Month: May 2015

On teaching and breaks

| favoritecupoftea

I taught neither to earn nor to get credits. I didn’t I do it for glory and definitely not because I had no choice. I taught because I genuinely wanted to help students achieve their dreams.

When I started teaching last year, I vowed that I would try my hardest to help my students avoid having failing marks. I know that if they fail, it is a reflection of how I was as a professor. Like I said, I became one because I wanted to help students achieve their dreams, not to be an instrument to shatter them. I swear, I will never find joy in failing students.

And so I was very much committed in helping them understand the subject matter. I would go to lengths in considering different methods of teaching just to make sure they grasp the lesson. I gave as much opportunities for them to make up and provided them with a supportive tap each time. I did this because then I would be at peace knowing that I was being a good professor and so when they still fail, it is of their own doing.

After two semesters, I am proud to see how my students evolved to be more diligent, confident and brave. I am hoping that I helped prepared them not only for the next semesters in college but also in life. And I would be very thrilled to see how they end up to be.

Indeed, the happiness and excitement that I felt in my 1st year as a professor was incomparable. I have never felt so fulfilled. I was the happiest when I am inside the four corners of the classroom. I knew, without a doubt, that I found my favorite playground.

But today, I have finally made a decision – I am not teaching next semester, and probably even after that. And like any kid, I am certain that I will feel a sense of longingness this coming year. Sadly, just when I finally found time to feed my heart’s earnest desires, circumstances made me cut the tube – albeit temporarily.

I say, with all sincerity, that taking a leave from teaching was no easy decision to make. Despite the growing pressure at work and the incessant increase of responsibilities, I wasn’t ready to give it up. Even when my Saturdays started to get filled with work, I was willing to make time. I was even keen on being strategic with wedding duties just so I can continue teaching.

But I figured, am no superwoman. Somehow, I realized that I have to choose my priorities. This is not to say that teaching is not a priority, it is. But I am only getting married once and we have a big fight to prepare for next year. So yes, teaching can take a back seat because I have the rest of my life to do it anyway.

For the mean time, I will miss preparing every Friday night for my class the next day. It was my principle to never go to class unprepared. Heck I even prepared better and was more diligent as a professor than I did as a student. I wanted to always give my best, because my students deserve nothing less. I believe this, as I expected the same from my professors back when I was still in school.

I will surely miss challenging my students to rise above adversities and strive to be better. I will miss exchanging occasional chats with them during breaks. I will miss calling them out when they become negligent or disrespectful.

I will miss being a professor, a mentor. Really, this past year was such a sweet ride I cannot wait to go through it all over again by 2016.

On Peptalks and Blessings.

| favoritecupoftea

It was almost midnight, the eve of our pre-wedding shoot. I came home really tired and exhausted. I washed up and was prepared to doze off when I heard my facebook messenger’s notification sound. I reached for my phone and read the message. It says: “Ma’am good evening po. Magpapasalamat lang po ako for everything you have done for me para po makapasa ako sa Ateneo. Salamat po for the recommendation letter and for the advices you’ve imparted during our internship. Di po siguro ako makakapasa sa Ateneo kung di ko po kayo nakilala. Thank you po ulit and God bless po.”

To this date, I still have goosebumps reading this message. It was just a week ago when I signed up as a writer for a religious publication. My first assignment was to write about my recent blessing. I, honestly, took the time to think of a subject. I am being blessed everyday by the Good Lord. But it was hard to write about something that could merit publication. I wanted something different, something with impact. Then this message came. What a beautiful blessing, isn’t it?

Though I wasn’t the direct recipient of God’s graciousness, but in my own simple way, I became an instrument to deliver God’s blessing. I, too, feel so blessed.

The message was from “A”. I met her last summer. She, together with two other interns, came from the same university I went for college. They are even taking the same degree I did and are huge fans of volleyball like I am. They were most of the time silent, timid and just waited for tasks which they accomplished on time.

I admit that it is in my nature to pep talk younger people when I feel like it, especially when they show interest. I know I am not in the best position to inspire and give advice considering how little I have accomplished in life. But this is me. I do not shy away from encouraging people to keep on achieving their dreams and reaching their full potential, even if I, myself, still have a lot of working to do.

I learned and am still learning a lot of things from different people, no matter how simple or irrelevant they seem to be to society. Every encounter, every word matters. When you make sense of all the things in life, you realized that they are all part of one great plan. No idea is too small, no endeavour is too huge.

And yes, I am glad I was being me last summer. When I found out they are considering to pursue law, I did not think twice of encouraging them. Of course I said all the good things about being a lawyer. Bias aside, we all know having the prefix “Atty” to your name means having access to a couple of perks. But I made sure they are aware that regardless of how people see lawyers, law is a noble profession and it does wonders to the world if used properly.

Then came the choice of school. Since two of them are academic scholars, they know they’d have limited choices. But being me, I asked them to just sign up and apply wherever. If they pass, then they make the decision with their families. At least, they know they tried and wouldn’t spend some time thinking about what ifs.

A few months ago, “A” requested for a recommendation letter and informed me that she is taking the entrance exam at my law school. I was ecstatic. Of course I will give her a beautiful recommendation. If anything, I was happy she took the next step and opened herself to possibilities. I was hoping she’ll make it. And as you now know, she actually did.

When she attributed passing the law school’s entrance exam to me, there was indeed quite a beautiful ring to it. I am very grateful that I became part of her recent win in life. The truth, however, is that she passed because she was capable, that was all her. She was meant to pass the exam, the Lord wanted her to be there.

I truly believe that we have limitless possibilities no matter how trying circumstances present themselves to be. We are in the steering wheel and we decide on which direction to take. There may be bumps on the road. We may run out of gas. The night may be too dark. But nothing can make a soul burning with passion and self worth fold in the midst of any tribulation.

And with this recent blessing, I am resigned to the thought that no matter how little we think of ourselves, that should not keep us from trying to be a blessing to others just as the Lord blesses us every day.